CHARLIE: Now let’s talk about gaming journalism and corruption. Can we talk about gaming journalism, please, Mac? I’ve been dying to talk about it with you all day, OK? "Zoe Quinn," this name keeps coming up over and over again. Every day Zoe’s name is showin’ up on my websites. I look on Twitter, and this whole feed is Zoe Quinn! So I say to myself, “I gotta find this girl! I gotta go up to her and put my hate mail in the girl’s goddamn hands!” So I go up to her Twitter and what do I find out, Mac? What do I find out?! There is no corruption. So I decide, “Oh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper.” There’s no corruption in gaming journalism? You gotta be kidding me! I got boxes full of SJWs! So I start marchin’ my way down to Hideki Kamiya and I knock on his door and I say, “KAMIYA! KAMIYA! I gotta talk to you about Zoe!” And when he replies to me what do I find? There’s not a single goddamn tweet where he’s even against her! Mac, all of the allegations in this conspiracy have been made up. This Gamergate is a goddamn ghost town.

MAC: OK, Charlie I’m going to have to stop you right there. Not only do all of these allegations exist, but they’ve been posting about this shit on a daily basis. It’s all they’re talking about up there. Jesus Christ, dude, we are going to lose our games.

CHARLIE: Well, calm down because here’s one thing that’s not going to happen.

MAC: What?

CHARLIE: We’re not gonna lose our video games.

MAC: We’re not?

CHARLIE: Because we’ve already lost our video games.

MAC: If we’ve lost our video games, then that means we’ve lost our consumer identity! That means all of this was for nothing! Goddammit, dude, I am having a panic attack. I am actually having a panic attack.

CHARLIE: You know what, Vivian? Give this guy a cigarette, he’s freakin’ out.

MAC: Huh? Who?

CHARLIE: Vivian James. She’s the one who tipped me off to Zoe Quinn.

MAC: Who the hell is Vivian James?

CHARLIE: You don’t see the- oh shit, where the hell did she go?

[BOM BOM - CH… CHIKA-CHIKAAAAH]

5/02/14  
THEME